Act Two begins with Brian going on his own on an anthropological mission to study 'Jamaica Man' 'Very South of Soho Man, and 'The Caribbean Man.' He is working at a tiki bar when someone calls out, 'Hey Buddy!' He tells him that his name is not, in fact, Buddy, but Pal. Jordan Mooney appears in need of help. Her friend has been drinking champagne in the sun. Evidently, 'champagne is like perfume going in, sewage coming out!' Which begs the question as to what isn't like sewage when it's "coming out"? He takes Jordan and her friend to Owen, the stoned ambulance attendant.
He is so stoned he can hardly say, 'Brian, we've got to hit the road, man.'
The next day Jordan returns to see Brian. As luck would have it at this point, Doug Coughlin also appears.
Doug and Brian break into 'the old routine.' This includes such witty quips as:
He is so stoned he can hardly say, 'Brian, we've got to hit the road, man.'The next day Jordan returns to see Brian. As luck would have it at this point, Doug Coughlin also appears.
Doug and Brian break into 'the old routine.' This includes such witty quips as:- 'You look like a guy who shaves with a Brillo pad.'
- 'You look like a guy who only gets an erection on his birthday if the wind is right.'
Brian introduces his "rich chick" wife who is wearing a dental floss thong and is described as, 'waiting for everyone to notice her.' They go to see the band "Messenjah" who perform 'Run For The Shelter Of Your love.' which was omitted from the soundtrack.
Doug's wife claims that she has never been to a club, 'with such intense dance vibes.'
Brian soon realises that she is a prize wanker!
They begin courtship which includes:
Doug's wife claims that she has never been to a club, 'with such intense dance vibes.'
Brian soon realises that she is a prize wanker!They begin courtship which includes:
- Driving a jeep without looking
- Riding horses on the beach
- Drawing pictures of each other
- Judo
Making love under a waterfall. This involves three things:
She takes off her bra.
She shows him her tits
They shag
Jordan begins to suggest that their kids should have dreadlocks.
They then have a pseudo intellectual conversation. Here we see Brian pontificating life's intricacies.
He realises that, 'Days get shorter and shorter, nights longer and longer, before you know it, your life is just one long night with a few comatose daylight hours.' Soon after this astounding revelation, he thinks about the man who makes the little plastic things that hold shoelaces together.
Jordan informs him that they are called Fluglebinders!
The truth is realised! Life's tasks and quests are as pointless as plastic things that hold shoelaces together and the quest for improving one's life within the structures of society is pointless. She claims he's frustrated. He talks about the man who makes the little plastic things that hold shoelaces together. She informs him that they are called fluglebinders. Later that evening Doug challenges Brian's machismo. Brian responds by throwing a book of matches at a bourgeois woman, who subsequently claims not to have "fuck me" written on her forehead, but allows him to fuck her anyway. Jordan catches Brian going home with her.
Jordan goes back to New York. Doug and his wife are going back to New York to play the stock market. Brian is going back to New York to watch Bonnie (the bourgeois woman) doing aerobics 'every fucking morning' and drink carrot juice. Doug bets him it won't last. At this stage Brian has never won a bet with Doug.
She takes off her bra.
She shows him her tits
They shag
Jordan begins to suggest that their kids should have dreadlocks.They then have a pseudo intellectual conversation. Here we see Brian pontificating life's intricacies.
He realises that, 'Days get shorter and shorter, nights longer and longer, before you know it, your life is just one long night with a few comatose daylight hours.' Soon after this astounding revelation, he thinks about the man who makes the little plastic things that hold shoelaces together. 
Jordan informs him that they are called Fluglebinders!
The truth is realised! Life's tasks and quests are as pointless as plastic things that hold shoelaces together and the quest for improving one's life within the structures of society is pointless. She claims he's frustrated. He talks about the man who makes the little plastic things that hold shoelaces together. She informs him that they are called fluglebinders. Later that evening Doug challenges Brian's machismo. Brian responds by throwing a book of matches at a bourgeois woman, who subsequently claims not to have "fuck me" written on her forehead, but allows him to fuck her anyway. Jordan catches Brian going home with her.
Jordan goes back to New York. Doug and his wife are going back to New York to play the stock market. Brian is going back to New York to watch Bonnie (the bourgeois woman) doing aerobics 'every fucking morning' and drink carrot juice. Doug bets him it won't last. At this stage Brian has never won a bet with Doug.